On Being Immortal

There is a deep seated need in each one of us to be remembered. We may not acknowledge it, we may even laugh at someone who boldly states it but it is there, in the centre of our hearts.We seek it all the time, desperate to leave a piece of ourselves in the form of a memory in someone else's life; a photograph immortalized by the internet; a song we sang off key; a family video of us just goofing around; a blog we used to write which will be preserved for eternity no matter how long it has lain dusty. This is the reason we suffer anguish, when the computer crashes and leaves us a wreckage of our beloved collection of photographs and videos; when the internet goes off and you realise that the draft you were writing was not saved. We have become hardened by the time we have spent on this earth, developing into a civilization. We no longer trust the human memory, how much can it take anyway? There are too many of us, we reason, not everyone will be remembered. We doubt our own memories too when we suddenly find that we can't remember the dates of important events in our lives or even the most important moments themselves.

So you see we are not really to blame to take advantage of the advancements of our race to try and preserve a piece of ourselves, the best and the brightest ones so that when we are gone, they will live on. We are scared to imagine the lives of our ancestors who we know nothing about. We wonder if we are making the same mistakes they once made, because we have no way to know their stories. Sure we have a history, that can teach us the futility of war and the importance of being human but its never personal enough to make us sit up and take notice. We can think of people from history in third person but we can't imagine ourselves in their place because we can't really feel it. It is important therefore to be remembered for exactly who we were so that our future generations can look back and really know us.

Of course I may just be romanticizing it all and giving it more weight than it deserves. But I have to believe that the whole world has not just taken leave of its senses to spend such time and effort to make themselves immortal. Maybe it is actually the most important thing we are ever going to do and therefore worth the effort and the time we spend.

Or maybe I'm just rambling as usual...

Time After Time

Its nice to take a step back in time sometimes. That is exactly the feeling I got in the one month that I spent in Kolkata. Life has still managed to remain slow here and food miraculously cheap! The very concept of a cycle rickshaw gives you the blissful feeling that you have all the time in the world. While roads may be just as bad in other cities, here they have the effect of making you feel like you are moving in slow motion. Even the very nature of the people will make it hard for you to rush things along. Add to that the long hours of daylight and the present humid weather, well I atleast was thrown back. It is not an altogether unpleasant feeling. Sometimes it is nice to slow things down, but unfortunately it is all just an illusion and time ultimately does fly by and likewise my time in Kolkata also came to an end. It served as a reminder that life always moves along and there is nothing you can do to change that. All we can do is navigate, change the direction in which we want to move and most importantly enjoy every step of the journey. I read a quote that said: "Life may not be fair but its still a gift". I thought it was so true. Through all the trials and tribulations that we go through, it will only matter later if we were happy. And that is our choice, to be happy with our lives, with ourselves, to look for the good and bright and positive and disregard all else. If we can channelize all this energy within us and focus on setting a direction for our lives, there is nothing in the world we cannot achieve. Its seems really strange to me that this is what I took away from this trip but I did. I came away with a lot of conviction; faith in myself and a resolve to make things happen in my life. I brought back some amazing and unforgettable memories from this trip which I will always cherish. And it was symbolic that as my flight was taking off from Kolkata, the heavens opened up to let loose a flood of rain. I was greeted by the same pouring rain on landing in Mumbai with the only difference being the cool breezes that followed the rain instead of the humidity of Kolkata. For a moment I was nostalgic, wishing myself back. But alas you can only move forward, not backwards, and so I prepare myself to turn the page and start a new chapter in my life. It is a little scary but that is only natural. Life is always a test of our character and our strength but we are the only ones who get to decide whether we lived up to our expectations or not. In the end, we have only ourselves to face...

And with that I end this very random rambling.. Until next time, Cheers!

Suddenly

Well as suddenly as it began, the summer seems to be over. I say seems because the rain doesn't seem to have dispelled any of the heat. As I sit here with a beer mug full of mango milkshake (sheer heaven!), I want to take a moment to look back. A lot has happened this summer starting with me taking the GMAT. I figured that taking the test would be the hardest part but apparently that isn't entirely accurate. Ever since I got my test results, all I've done is think about my application essays. They somehow make you think long and hard about your life. After struggling with where to begin for more than a month, I decided to start at the unlikeliest place, my email inbox. It needed some cleaning and organizing anyway and somehow reading old emails helped me see a lot of things about myself very clearly. It was also a beautiful walk down memory lane, and made me feel grateful for everything I have had in my life: friends who have stood by me through thick and thin, the places that I have been to and the experiences that I have had. In the mad rush of the world today, where everyone always seems one step ahead of you and there is always something left to catch up on, its nice to feel grounded and know that you wouldn't trade your life for anyone else's. I am a product of everything I have been through and for better or for worse that is who I am and I'm proud of it. There is nothing I would change because what I am today will help me get to where I want to be (this destination is unknown at the moment). I truly believe that everything always falls into place at the right time and all you have to do is keep working towards that goal of yours.

Cheers!

Happy Marriage!

Some Nights

At this moment, this is what my life is about: a delightful diary, a concise planner, an interesting book, a pair of much cherished earphones and a very childish pencil pouch. And together they are contribute to making me very happy :)